When Will My Baby Start Sleeping Through The nIght?
Every tired parent’s most wondered question: when will my little one start sleeping through the night?! Well first things first, let’s talk about what sleeping through the night means as the definition often differs for everyone. Your well-meaning friend may say that their baby has been sleeping through the night since 4 weeks old, but that may still include feedings. Or, someone else might say their baby is sleeping through but really they’re only getting 7-8 hours, which is not quite enough. As a sleep consultant, sleeping through the night is whatever your little one is capable of and needs at each age. Which, if you’re reading this, may be very different from how much sleep they’re actually getting.
So, When Do Babies Start Consolidating Night Sleep?
The short answer is: every baby is different! There's three main things to consider when it comes to sleeping through the night: your child's age, if they know how to settle themselves, and how long they are able to go overnight without a feeding. First take into account how often your baby can go in between feedings during the day. If you normally feed every 3-4 hours, then we can at least expect that of them overnight. However, most kiddos can go even longer depending on their age and their personal growth and development. If you’re not sure, give your pediatrician a quick call and ask their thoughts about your baby specifically.
No matter how many times your little one needs to eat overnight, you can absolutely still teach your baby to sleep longer stretches in between necessary feedings. Consider how your little one is feeding at each waking. Are they taking a full feed just like they would during awake time? They may be truly hungry! Are they falling asleep while feeding? They may be using that feeding for help back to sleep and depending on their age, it’s time to teach them how to consolidate that sleep all on their own.
Average Sleep Needs & Capabilities By Age
Here’s a general outline of what I’ve seen to be average among the kiddos I’ve worked with:
0-3 months = Almost all newborns I’ve worked with wake up at least once in a 10-12 hour night! They are not yet capable of learning how to settle all on their own every time they wake and more frequent feeds are normal. If you’re waking very frequently (more than every few hours), consider your little one’s daytime schedule to make sure they are not going down overtired or undertired for bedtime, which can make falling asleep and staying asleep much more difficult.
4-7 months = Babies are now capable of learning how to self-settle. Meaning that if/when they do wake overnight as they go through multiple sleep cycles, they know HOW to put themselves back to sleep. They now need 11-12 hours of night sleep, which sometimes includes a night feed or two if your baby still needs them according to your pediatrician. When they do feed, they are now capable of taking a full feed and going back down into their sleep space and putting themselves back to sleep.
8-12 months = Almost all babies I work with naturally drop night feeds at this age. Unless advised against by their pediatrician, most kiddos are able to consolidate night sleep and need 11-12 hours straight.
Now did you notice that past the newborn days, I didn’t mention anything about your baby waking to be rocked, held, bounced, etc back to sleep? That’s because once they’ve hit 16 weeks, your baby is capable and developmentally ready to learn how to consolidate that night sleep as much as possible all on their own (that goes for naps too)!
In a 24 hour period, a baby between 4-12 months needs 11-12 hours of sleep and at least two 1-2 hour naps per day. A newborn needs much more sleep than that, averaging about 10-12 hours of night sleep and 4-6 naps per day, ranging anywhere from 20 minutes to 2 hours each.
How To Get To Consolidated, 11-12 Hour Nights
If you’re reading this and saying to yourself, well that’s not my baby! Or you’re going on nights, weeks, or even months of multiple night wakings, guess what?! It is possible to teach your little one HOW to do this!
Sleep is not a developmental milestone, just like your baby won’t one day just hop on a bike and start riding it perfectly. They will first be taught where the pedals are, how to push on them to make the bike move, how to steer with the handlebars, and even take lots of practice rides with your hand on the back of the seat. Independent sleep is the same thing! It is a learned skill that requires teaching, support, and practice.
And to anticipate and answer the next question going through your mind right now, no that does not mean you have to leave your child to cry-it-out if you don’t want to. There are plenty of other options now when it comes to sleep coaching, even as gentle as being hands-on, in the room with your little one the whole time if that’s what you’d prefer. You don’t have to wait until you’re so sleep deprived that you’ll do anything to get your baby to sleep. If you are already at that point, there are absolutely solutions available so that you don’t have to keep living on forever in an exhausted state.
If you’d like to learn more about what a sleep solution looks like for your family so that you can ALL start getting the rest you need and deserve, don’t hesitate to contact me! I offer free assessment calls so we can discuss how to get your little one on track to better sleep. Trust me, your baby wants and needs that sleep, they just don’t know HOW to get it. So let’s guide ‘em there!
